“I hope many fans of his will visit the statue from far and wide and I hope that Fulham fans will appreciate seeing the finest performer in the world amongst them, the finest fans in the world."
On October 18, 2008 a monument dedicated to the life of Johnny Haynes, once described by Pele as “the best passer of the ball I’ve ever seen”, was erected outside the stand bearing his name at Craven Cottage, home of Fulham FC in West London.
However, the quotation annotated above does not correspond to the paragraph directly beneath it. This particular excerpt is actually taken from Mohamed Al Fayed, the long-suffering Fulham Chairman, to commemorate the unveiling of a second statue this coming Sunday April 3, 2011.
So, for whom has this additional landmark on the banks of the Thames been commissioned? One would think that it would be for a Fulham footballer of equal standing, enjoying a reputation as enduring as the one-time England captain and first ever player to earn £100,000 per week. Could it be George Cohen – 1966 World Cup Winner and all-round good egg? Perhaps Gordon Davies – scorer of 179 goals for the club over two spells spanning three decades?
Not a player, you say? Maybe a manager then, say, one of the ilk of Jean Tigana, who oversaw the club’s promotion to English football’s elite division after 33 years away in 2001 or Roy Hodgson, who took the Whites to their first European Final (or Continental occasion of any kind) in 2009?
No? What do you mean, ‘he had nothing to do with the club’? Wait, did he visit the ground to witness a 2-0 win over Wigan Athletic in 1999? But I thought I heard you say he had nothing to do with football either, except I could’ve sworn he was appointed director then Honorary Chairman at Exeter City in 2002.
At this point, do not pick your brains for the names of Fulham board members and kit men passed. If I told you that he passed away in 2009, any reasonable person amongst you would suggest that ‘Oh, well, then that must be Fulham legend and national treasure Bobby Robson, who has already been granted the freedom of Ipswich, Durham and Newcastle upon Tyne’, but if I was you I’d throw out any lingering sense of conventional wisdom.
In fact, throw out any notion of football whatsoever. Or any other sport, for that matter. Just begin again and start throwing in the first names that come into your head.
For the statue to be unveiled this Sunday outside Fulham Football Club’s football stadium is of none other than Al Fayed’s former friend…Michael Jackson.
That’s right. Michael. Jackson. “I hope many fans of his will visit the statue from far and wide.” Al Fayed pleaded, having relinquished control of London’s world famous Harrods department store, its intended destination. If ever there was a better example of a club being exploited for financial gain, I’d like to see it. In statue form. Overlooking the river. Forever.
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